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The title is a fortune that G claims he got. I would fight him, but I one time got one with nothing in it. I don’t mean “No fortune in the cookie”. I mean, “No cookie. No fortune.” It was just a empty bag of air. I spent the rest of the day wondering if I was going to die of aphixiation.

Anyway, while at Pei Wei this evening, G and I were discussing ways to approach the attractive girl at the counter. I suggested a fortune cookie with “Now’s the time to ask out that cute girl behind the counter.” But then I realized that there could be a really strong market for pickup lines in fortune cookies. Or even a short bio and the person’s phone numbers.

Think of it people: The Fortune Nookie.

–Snoopykiss has been doing his homework.

Not out of resolutions, but more out of revolutions, I’ve noticed changes in myself. All seem to be for the better. Pasts I’ve overcome. Demons I’ve pummeled into the ground and have resurfaced. New habits I’ve taken on. Heads I’ve shaven.

But the one that’s interested me is in this current relationship with Kathy. And it is in this instance that I’ve grown, rather fallen into love here.

Growing involves setting roots and feelings things out and going at a nature’s pace. Like the good Lord intended.

Falling usually involves lots of exciting and crazy emotions, with your synapses firing more times than a redneck wedding. Until you stop falling. Then it hurts. Like a mothafuka.

–Snoopykiss went to Ikea today and is thinking funny.

We always view national tragedies in horror, but it rarely sinks in how gruesome they are until we see them first-hand. And it’s rarely pretty.

I got to see some of the damage done by Katrina during my visit back home to Cut Off. Thankfully, my home town was mostly spared, but the scene became completely different once we passed the levees that kept the water out.

Going to Grand Isle was a sobering realization of how destructive Mother Nature can be when we ignore it.

–Snoopykiss is sobered up. It’s time for New Years.

But not in a “Survivor” way. They’re actually going to get this boot.

Kathy helped pick out this … this … Wow. I didn’t know what to say when I first saw it. I mean…it’s got barb wire! Her dad actually said, “I could have made that for you.”, which only furthered the experience.

It’s a Birdhouse, it’s got barb wire, and a license plate on a turquoise Boot. Dood.

Also in Tommy House news, Mike proposed to his hunny. And she said yes. Go them!

–Snoopykiss is now pondering, “How do I get this on the plane?”

While on a complete high from watching Doom in all of it’s B-movie goodness, there was a freezing, yet friendly cat outside the house. It was cold, and I had some leftover tuna from a previous roommate. Worked out nicely.

Coincidentally, if there is such a thing, I was thinking about getting a pet. But not this one as it disappeared after we gave it a gap in the garage door. It’s amazing how you’ll talk to an animal, even though you know it’s not listening.

And speaking of cute…

–Snoopykiss just leveled up his Karma.

So, I’m chatting away with Miss Sam, of Weyandt’s affection, and discussing a possible X-mas party.

There’s the traditional White Elephant party, but when your attendance reaches 100+, you’ve gotta bend the rules to make this work. Otherwise, you’ll be there till my Birthday (St. Patrick’s Day. I like Legos).

In America, you can turn anything into a game by adding either “Strip” or “Drinking” to it. So, what would happen if there was a penalty for stealing?

–Snoopykiss is suddenly in the Christmas mood.

I made a turkey in a paper bag that was so juicy that it de-winged itself upon removal. BOO-YAH! This was probably due to the uber-slow cooking oven I’ve got. And by uber-slow, I mean the 325 setting really means ~250.

I also gave a Thanksgiving prayer, so unique that I got a round of applause (I think, even from the Aethist) after my Amen. You just had to have been there.

Mad, mad props to that old black lady who I’ll probably never see again, but talked me into this whole mess. I was able to impress a bunch o’ people, including myself because of it.

–Snoopykiss has mad turkey skillz!

So, I successfully completed my “Stick it to the Man” Tour with a buttload of pictures and some new friends. To sum it up, I went from Boston to a Blues weekend in DC and had myself a freggin’ blast. Met up with Meg and her recovering Mormon roommate, Jewel (who is talking me into taking another SittM Tour, to the West Coast).

Since then I’ve been through Tulsa, St. Louis (x2), Austin, got my Kung Fu Yellow Belt, lost a roommate (down to 3), went to a Polka Festival, parents went through 2 hurricanes, lost and uncle (unrelated. RIP Uncle Melvin) and threw a Food and Spirits Party.

I think it’s now time to retreat into my house for a while until the Red White and Blues invasion.

–Snoopykiss. Not just for breakfast anymore.

After a long train ride, it’s always great to be greated by a welcoming female. Who’s hot. And a redhead. And Snoopykisses you before you get 5 words in. Apparently, that one was from Jenny-Lynn. *snear* I’ll get you my pretty.

One thing I’ve noticed is that the further I go, the more iPod ads the city has. It started off with Chicago and every section of the train on “The El” having 3 adds on them. So, you’ll see this pink, green, and blue blur right above you, in an otherwise, non-colorful ccity. This time, walking into the main train/bus terminal, my eyes were assaultled by 35 iPod posters, between ones my size to ones that could envelop my house.

Touring Boston involved seeing some very historic sites, lots of names I should have remembered from Miss Gregory’s American History class, and a very interesting tour around MIT by Amanda, a graduate and one of the faculty there. Also one of my favorite follows evar. That gave me a happy.

In the back of my mind, I was still worried about housing in NYC and whether I would have to cancel, because I didn’t want to pay $100/night (all of the hostels were booked). After many calls and requests from friends, Eli of Impecible Timing came through and I can rest easier knowing that I won’t be asking the winos to move over and use my iBook cover for a pilow.

–Snoopykiss is glad that not everyone talks like he thought they would up here.

Canada. That Maple Leaf place. America’s Attic. (You don’t go up there very often, but when you do, you’re like “Wow! Look at all this cool stuff!”). That was our post-Chicago destination. Sans air conditioning (which stopped making an awful grinding noise halfway through the trip), we found ourselfs getting more and more nervous.
Could it be the hordes of beautiful Canadian women Chris had lined up to host us? Nope.
The prospect of finding out that they really do have flappy heads and fart a lot? Non.
Excited at the prospect of paying $1.11/litre? Nien.

I’m putting my money on that I was unaware of the plan to go through Toronto, and didn’t bring my Passport, Birth Certificate or anything. Long story short, after a car-search and many quizzical looks from the Customs agents when we told them we were here for swing dancing, we made it through. Needless to say, we did the Happy Butt Dance in the car.

We finally got to Toronto, only to find out that the dance (Middle of the Greek area) where we were supposed to meet our hosts ended hours before we got there. Bollocks. After some team discussion, we realized that our best bet was to follow through and keep on truckin’ with no rest or break till New York. But not until we checked out what Toronto is known best for.

Strip Clubs. (Locations curtosey of war-driving)

Chris had never been and although they do nothing for me, I figured that he needed some “relaxation” after such a rough set of circumstances. Even bought the dude a lap dance. But the funniest part was how the two of us were critiquing the gals more than anything else. “Holly’s got better isolation.” “Kathy can do that.” “I’ve seen…oh wait…nope. I haven’t.”

Now after some on-the road planning, I got dropped off in Utica to take a cheap-arse train to Boston where I’ll be meeting up with the lovely Andrea for a few days. On the way here, I gave a 70% tip because I was thrilled out of my pointy little skull to be able to walk into a Denny’s, have my own room, two plugins and free wi-fi. God Bless technology and great waitresses.

— Snoopykiss is going to iSleep.